I Never Know Where I Am Headed

By Seth McGuire

I want more out of life than this

Everyday loops the same

Like looping a song on a long car ride

I've had to do that many times

I've had to repeat myself many times

Trying to undo regretful choices many times

Only to end up redoing the same regretful choices many times

I never know where I am headed

Locked in a small room flooded with paranoia

I tell myself the sticky floors wont let me leave

I try to find some form of comfort

But I forgot that word long ago

When the discomfort of life settled in

Immortalized by the stall I've locked myself in

I lie to myself and say everything will be okay

But I know that's a lie

I never know where I am headed

Stuck in the 2009 Honda Civic owned by a shady college student that is my life

Seemingly young and new yet old enough to want a new one

The feeling of breaking down always feels close

Always seeing Tesla's and Lamborghini on the streets

Reminding me of what I really am

They say it's whats on the inside that matters

But inside is full of drugs and regret

Not to forget the broken headlight

So I never know where I am headed