Beautiful Brains

By Cecily Salyer.

    Some jobs are normal, and some are a little more obscure or bizarre. For example, I had a friend that was a simple banker and another that became a trauma nurse. We're all different. Me? Well, I have the weird job. You can call me the brain picker. I take brains out of dead animal skulls.

     At first I was a bit grossed out. It was messy and smelled bad and I had to come to work without eating breakfast or risk vomiting. I even became a vegetarian because every time I ate meat I saw it as brains and felt like I was going to become some kind of zombie. However it's been a few years now, and I am used to it. I'm better at doing a clean job and can split the skull right down the middle. It always has this satisfying crack, like when you break open a geode to see the shimmering gems inside. It's so exciting.

     Anyway, then I take the brain out. Some are small and don't take very long, and others require more time. The brains all look a little different to me, though everyone else can't even tell a cow's from a sheep's. Idiots. Also, some parts of the brains are more squishy than others and can be damaged easily. I prefer to be careful with them, but I'll admit that sometimes I make a mistake, not that anyone needs them.

     Yesterday I heard the guys that bring in the animals talking. One of them said he watched me the other day and that I was playing with a cow brain. He said I'm creepy.

Creepy? I'm creepy? He's the one that was spying on me while I was just doing my job. So what if I actually focus and take interest in my work? I am so sorry that they have meaningless jobs that can't fill the void of their empty lives. They have no right to judge me.

     Someone asked me if I knew where that guy was since he hasn't come back to work in a while. Why do they ask me? I don't know the man, and I don't want to. I feel like people are watching me all the time now. I can't stand it. What did I do? Just let me work.

     A couple more people haven't come to work since last week. Everyone is worried, except me. I think it's a good thing. They were too nosy and rude. They aren't in my way anymore and I can work in peace. Finally.

     For being such imbeciles, they had beautiful brains.