The Little Brother I Never Had
By Noah Kimbrough
When I was in middle school, my family and I chose to challenge the belief that the cycle of poverty cannot be broken. We challenged the idea that children who grow up relying on government assistance will have no desire to better their economic status as they grow up to be adults. We challenged the idea that giving a child in a bad situation a taste of a loving, stable family will only make them feel worse about their situation. The importance of something to hope for can not be overstated, especially as it pertains to children growing up in a bad situation.
My family was put in touch with a twenty-three year-old mother of six children while I was in middle school. She had stopped going to school after the seventh grade. During her time in school, she managed to be passed on to the next grade without ever learning how to read, write, or do any sort of math. At fourteen years of age, she became pregnant with her first child. She quickly learned that the government provides a mother living on welfare a certain amount of money per month for every child she had. By the time she was twenty, she was a mother of five children with five different fathers. By the time we met her, she had just had her sixth.
My family fell in love with one child in particular. His name is Nate. Nate’s mother always spoke of him as though he was a troublemaker. His mother often made poor choices that either put her children in danger, landed her in jail, or both. When she was unable to take care of her children, we did our best to show Nate love, understanding, and belief in him. He was a brilliant little boy with a phenomenal memory and a kind soul. Nate was one of the three or four children from his family to see what it was like to go to a place where there was food for them every time they got hungry, a place where he did not have to sleep on the floor.
During his several multi-week stays with us, he was often asked to recall his multiplication tables and write sentences. He was encouraged to read anything he wanted, and ask questions if he was curious about something. We tried very hard to create an environment of love, learning, and comfort for Nate.
My parents offered to adopt him multiple times. Unfortunately, his mother, who appreciated what we were doing, was not ready to part with her child. He was not able to officially become part of our family. I hope the time he spent with us gave him something to look forward to. I hope it planted a seed in his head. We constantly told him he could accomplish anything and be anything if he worked hard enough.
I believe a person is, for the most part, shaped by their family and their situation, unless there is a strong influence from other people or an experience. If we succeeded, Nate will be able to get the education he needs to do what he wants. He will not let his environment mold him. We tried to instill a strength in him that allows him to stand the pressure he will have to fight. I would do it all again, and with more enthusiasm and joy. The cycle of poverty is an unfortunate and seemingly unstoppable idea. The only way to defeat an idea that seems unbeatable is to educate yourself and rise above it. This applies to Nate’s situation. Most of his problems come from bad choices that his mother and grandparents made. That is unfortunate, but it’s no excuse for him. I hope, if he learned anything from his time with us, he learned life is not where you’re from, it’s how you choose to spend your time on Earth, and how willing you are to work hard for the life you wish to live.
I pray every day for Nate. I pray that God grants Nate patience to persevere through all of his trouble. I ask that God gives Nate clarity to see the big picture. Lastly, I ask God to help Nate remember that he is not alone.
